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A nagging feeling signals there is something deeper going on

Whenever you feel something was off, but you cannot put the finger on the issue — a nagging feeling signals there is something deeper going on, that your gut feeling recognises, even when your brain did not fully process it.

Take the time to recognise it, reflect on it, get coached on it — you will get deep insights and powerful learning moments.

I felt the need to share this experience because it was a big Aha moment for me — and it may resonate with others.

I had a peer coaching session a few weeks back and I felt something was off, at least part of the session. I could not put my finger on the issue. At that point it was just a nagging feeling.

Step one

I discussed the session during my mentor coaching hour and my mentor highlighted for me the exact moments when my energy changed. She reflected back to me what she noticed and asked me what was there at that moment. Her feedback showed me when exactly the energy change happened and gave me a starting point for reflection: what was happening in the session at that particular moment? How was it for me before and after that?

Step two

With this new insight, I started thinking back on the coaching session: what was the topic, how was I feeling about it? What was going on in my head when my energy shifted? I left the ideas marinate for a couple of days — my usual processing time for inner work — and one morning I woke up with a new insight.

In my coaching session, I felt not good enough. I felt intimidated by my peer coach — she was way further in her journey than me. How could I help her if I am struggling with the same things, at a much greater level than she?

Step three

I needed a couple more days and another peer coaching session — me as client this time — to untangle all the ideas and emotions. I shared my issue and my insights with the coach and her questions guided me to go even deeper. I had my ideas reflected back to me in a concise and clear manner and I was able to see for myself what the red thread of my thoughts was.

We coach the client, not the problem.

This is one of the fundamentals of coaching. I knew it. I learned about it. Nothing new. Still, when I was in a triggering situation, I fell back into my old thinking patterns — and was not there for my client. I was thinking of a solution to her problem, instead of being there with her.

By experiencing this first hand and having coaches around me to help unravel it, this concept is now part of me on a much deeper level than it could ever be from a book.

I have emphasised the steps you may recognise during your own coaching sessions. Trust them. Trust your coach. Trust the system — it works.